SCREAM
WHERE DID MY HEAD GO I THINK I LOST IT SOMETIME LAST DECEMBER I STILL HAVE STAINS ON MY KNEES FROM WHEN YOU MADE THEM BLEED JUST BECAUSE IM SAD DOESNT MAKE THIS POETIC IM PUTTING WORDS IN ITALICS IM PUTTING MY PAIN IN HELVETICA
I PUT YOUR NAME IN THE STARS AND ALL YOU DID WAS PUT HOLES IN MY HEART I DIDNT REALIZE GIVING YOU THE GALAXY MEANT YOU WOULD TAKE IT AWAY FROM ME YOU MADE ME FEEL LIKE HEAVEN WHEN I WAS GOING THROUGH HELL BUT I KEPT GOING I WAS WRONG TO ASSUME YOU WOULD AS WELL
YOU DO NOT GET TO DECIDE WHEN I AM WORTHY/ WHEN THE SPACE THAT I OCCUPY IS THE RIGHT SIZE/ YOU DONT GET TO DECIDE WHEN I AM ENOUGH/ WHETHER THE FAT ON MY THIGHS OR THOUGHTS IN MY MIND ARE TOO LITTLE OR TOO WIDE/ YOU DONT GET TO DECIDE/ WHETHER TODAY I WILL BE A ZERO OR BE ON CLOUD NINE/ YOU ARE NOT THE DICTATOR OF MY HAPPINESS/ YOU WILL NOT BE MY DEMISE/ IVE SPENT TOO LONG LOVING IN COMPROMISE
I AM NOT GOING TO BREAK I AM NOT MADE OF PORCELAIN I AM NOT GLASS AND IM NOT GOING TO SHATTER I MAY HAVE LUNGS THAT ARE CRUMPLED BUT I HAVE A HEAD THATS MADE OF STEEL I NO LONGER FEEL THE URGE TO FILL THE BATH WATER TOO HIGH ABOVE MY HEAD I DONT WANT TO EMPTY THE MEDICINE CABINET I DONT WANT TO TURN OUT THE LIGHTS I AM GOING TO BE SOMETHING LIKE GRAVITY, SOMETHING STRONG, IM TERRIFIED BUT IM NOT GOING TO STOP BELIEVE ME IM NOT GOING TO STOP IM NOT GOING TO STOP IM NOT GOING TO STOP
2016